King Gargothakon Must Die
King Gargothakon Must Die
Playing with my daughter, Kaylie (6), my son Malcom (3), and their friend Faith (7) today. Kaylie decided to write a play. She wrote lines for all of us, encouraged us as we rehearsed, and directed us. Her direction included coaching on emoting and gesticulating in certain ways. She even indicated our marks on the carpet. It was tremendously fun, so I put her play into the proper format. The title is mine. Everything else – names, spellings, dialogue, locations – it’s all hers, with the exception of Malcolm’s character. He named that one himself.
Without further ado, I present…
KING GARGOTHAKON MUST DIE by Kaylie Rain Agresta
INT. GARGOTHA PALACE – MORNING
KING GARGOTHAKON (just waking up) What shall I do today? Some destruction? Yes! Yes! Yes! Minions!
MINION Yes sire?
KING GARGOTHAKON Go to the human world and destroy something!
MINION Yes sire!
CUT TO:
INT. DOJO OF THE LION KING – DAY
LION KING (Standing beside a magic mirror) On no! I must stop him. Come my friend, Hum. Let’s go kick some butt!
HUMMINGBIRD SUPERHERO (buzzing wings super fast) Let’s kick some boot-tays!
LION KING Right. Butts. With an extra ‘S’. Not just one.
CUT TO:
EXT. HUMAN WORLD – DAY
MINION Oh no, Lion King and his trusty sidekick found me!
LION KING
We found you minion, and we will destroy your evil plot! Get him!
HUMMINGBIRD SUPERHERO Gaaaarrrrrzzzz!
CUT TO:
INT. GARGOTHA PALACE – NIGHT
KING GARGOTHAKON
(watching Minion fight and lose to Lion King and Hummingbird Superhero) What? He failed? He is going to get in some serious trouble!
CUT TO: (Minion returns to Gargotha Palace)
KING GARGOTHAKON (CONT’D) You failed me! I asked one simple request and you failed me!
MINION I’m sorry, sire!
…the play would have continued to (I’m certain) a more satisfying conclusion, but their mother returned home, and I had to leave for the bank.
Performers (in order of appearance)
KING GARGOTHAKON – Me MINION – Kaylie Rain LION KING – Faith HUMMINGBIRD SUPERHERO – Malcolm
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Lou is an Ennie award-winning game designer and author of Club Anyone, a neonpunk novel set in the acclaimed Interface Zero game world, coming soon from WordFire Press. Words Like Bullets is his blog on writing, the writing life, and what's new with Lou. You can receive these blog posts direct to your inbox by subscribing to Lou News or just learn more about Lou at www.agrestasaurus.com